Perception is a pretty strong thing – it’s basically our vision based on our past experiences. It makes us see things the way we understand them, which is why two opposing opinions may be individually right to their proponents but appearing wrong, for all the wrong reasons, to the two warring parties.
Which is exactly what happened recently – perception, aggravated by hastily drawn conclusions, from both sides, resulted in a near-death experience. In a way, it’s good that lovers fight – something they say about the bond becoming stronger post a real good sparring! Neither really wanted to lose one another, which is why, much like the India-Pakistan dialogue, the lines of communication were kept open! Fortunately, they worked.
Sometimes, you need to let out steam, and only then can one understand the intentions of the other person. Hopefully, I’d like to believe that she understood that life can not be lived by constantly looking over the shoulder, it can only be lived by looking ahead. Unfortunate as the past experiences may have been, on which one constructs the edifice of one’s perception, with every new person you meet, one should start with a clean slate. Unless, of course, the instinct or the gut feeling says otherwise – in which case, you’ll be well-advised to listen to your inner voice.
One also needs to learn that certain actions, harmless in their own individual right, may be viewed slightly differently by another person, especially if that person happens to be of the opposite sex, given the different ways in which both sexes think. Even if the action is good, and the intentions are honest. Guess sometimes, you just need to give it some time. As they say, give some time to love, and give love some time.
She may not admit it, yet, or ever, but anyone would have said that despite her strong denials to the contrary, her feelings went much beyond the realm of fondness. It was apparent in the tone and tenor of her voice – she was upset, rightly as she believed, incorrectly as I thought – that while she may not have said it yet, but it was love right through and through.
Anyways, all’s well that ends well – love is not a game of one upmanship. As long as she believes she’s put her point across and is happy, I am happy.